Well, I am entirely awared that some of my friends[non-female] and Indian by birth and domicile will have grave objections and strong justifications against the title of this write up.Calling it an article or a write up is an understatement. Its much more than that, its outburst of ineffable emotions and disgust I have held since I started travelling on my own! I understand that there are men ogling at the fairer sex irrespective of any nationality..But since I have the first hand experience of this insulting and anguishing stares only in my land, thus I cannot comment on Non-Indian men.
Though I am not a raconteur, let me start by narrating some anecdotes which are so morally drained.Have you noticed a girl standing at a bus stop or better still travelling in a DTC bus. Well, if you are a boy offcourse you have! But next time when you see a girl walking alone in a busy not so posh market road just notice her closely.Yeah..I am really asking you to look at her!! She will be in a rush,completely conscious of her surroundings though trying to portray I-don't-care look and fully aware of those impertinent looks thrown freely in her direction! Man! She is not some celebrity ..Can't you guys let her walk in peace. The guilty here are most of the times unshaved public vehicle drivers, those dusty workers digging some road or some trying to copy Dhoom bikers! Well, I agree that their education has been limited and a subject on mannerism has been conveniently kept out of their curriculm. But believe me, they are a part of larger Indian population than those few who have taken their Moral Science seriously! The obscene gestures, lewd remarks on just anything possible, the temerity of pushing a girl or vituperations of these bus drivers and their mates. A girl goes through all this and more! Alas! we are developing and emerging...Eve-Teasing and Vulgarity in public behaviour is heading in the same direction as Global warming.
And if I reflect on the national agendas raised by some political parties then I cannot find a single party vouching to make the Indian roads anymore safer for girls and women to traverse. They strain their cords to gather minority votes, to woo the majority voters yet again and these insolent eve teasers with odd reservations and meritless quotas..But I cannot remember a single politician wasting the party's election resourses on woman voters. Strangely Indian Popualtion has 48.1% women! If we leave political parties alone, and dwell upon the reactions offered by a paunchy languid betel chewing policeman after listening to a complain from the fairer sex, I cannot be less disgusted. They can just offer you smirks or weird and petulant smiles in return! The condition is extremely revolting and unbearable, atleast for me.The state is so bad that I have made a resolution not to raise my daughter/daughters in this country. I know this decision is quite far-fetched but such is the extent of my irateness.
But till now we have been aberrating from the title" why do Indian men ogle?". Either they have this notion that they are always walking in a sanctuary and a female walking by is an intriguing species on brink of extinction! Or these guys have just landed on our planet from Neptune and they have not seen a female before! Well that explains the stares...but what about those ribald remarks and frowardness. I have just one logical explanation to it or rather two. They are devoid of any principles and morals and are budding crimnals who sleep without any conscience. And if such is the number of prospective crimnals in our country then we need to rethink about the foundation on which this nation stands! Man!! Is respecting a female is such a gargantuan task! I think it just needs inculcating some respect for your mothers,sisters and daughters back home. None of you are vagabonds i assume.
And now i have a brilliant plan to combat this arcane evil! Its kind of out of blue.It goes like this:
Every girl should be trained to use a pistol[ just a small one]. She should be given free licenses to carry this weapon, once she reaches the age of fourteen. And anyone..I mean it...just anyone who misbehaves with her, she should have legal right to shoot that person immediately.And to make the plan less unrealistic we can use tranquillizers in form of pistols.May be the hours of unconsciousness can wake up their conscience some day!
13 comments:
This one surely deserves a comment.. But i ain't really sure, how 2 react 2 this.. Coz 2 b honest, even i hv indulged in this crime (if u like 2 call it dat.. :D).. Bt it has always been a very harmless checking-out sort of a thing.. wich i guess every guy does intentionally/unintentionally.. But yea, i do agree, dat it can get disgusting at tymz.. bt the solution u proposed is definitely ruled out or else u'll find guys lying unconscious all over the place !!
Hey....i thnk u totally deviated from d ques u askd...."Why do Indian Men Ogle"....Wht i perceive is dat here our own ancient culture is acting as d hindrance.....Culture says 2 keep everything under d veil...nd if dat all happpens widout broadness of thinking it jst backstabs.....Well.... finally d soln whch u gave really doesn't depict ur sensible side......
i completely support this post...but wht surprises me is tht in our country i c girls being told all th etime to hav a good character, n dignity n all other expected qualities out of them (nt just by thr family but every second person thinks tht its his right cum duty to do so); while none of the guys r ever told to have theis subtle sense of mannerism....just comsidering tht they know it by default or may b dont even need to know it has resulted in this situation over generations......tho i still find ur solution pretty far-fetched (no matter hw much i'd love to practise it!) yet i hope we cn come up with something else....n we hav all the time of the world, after all it doesnt seem they r gonna stop ogling so soon!! :P
haha... i know the solution offered here is very very far-fetched!! well..knw wat this wasnt a solution actually..as i mentioned it was an emotional outburst..completely unrealistic..
I completely agree with SONAL... when expectations of the society from a girl's behaviour n character is garguntuan, a guy can behave as he please..irrespective f t fact that smtyms dis becomes so displeasing...
n PRABHAS.. checking out girls is no crime/offense... infact armously looking at a girl is more than often liked.. :)
here the impetus on vulgar ogling which is insulting...
AND SUSHANT more than our reserved but evolving culture its the psych that has to be blamed for all these evils... I knda deviated from t topic... n that aberration is already accepted!!
THANKS FOR LEAVING UR COMMENTS GUYS... UR POINT OF VIEW IS ALWAYS INVITED WITH A SMILE! TC.. :)
Okay.....here it goes....
First and foremost, I have noticed what you asked guys to do in your blog, quite a number of times. I have seen how a girl walking down a street acts, but more important than that, i have always paid more attention to the men and their reactions towards any girl they see.
YES, they do lech. At first I was amused at this but now it's just plain disgusting to see. I don't know how girls manage to walk through all that vulgar staring with unperturbed looks but i have to hand it to them, that they do a damn good job of it.
Now let us talk about the men staring. They are two kinds of staring. The first one is kind of a decent one in which we look at the girl/lady in a manner similar to how anyone would look at something that is aesthetically appealing to the eyes. There is nothing vulgar about this staring but it can be misinterpreted by the girl being stared at.
The second kind of staring is the vulgar one where in the men who do it are sick and perverted and usually think from their crotch with abnormally high levels of testosterone. Their upbringing hasn't exactly been what I would call 'proper' and they can't seem to control their urges.
After saying all this, there's also this statement which is true and that is - ALL MEN LECH. PERIOD.
At some point or the other every man has done it. Its sort of a biological thing. A lot of people wouldn't agree with this but then that's just hypocrisy. Ofcourse, i'm not saying that men are awful creatures who have sex on their minds like all the time.
The way i see it, to curb this entire problem, the whole system has to change. The entire society has to evolve. The one word that always come to the fore whenever i think about 'the society' is hypocrisy.
Give you an example. In a poll conducted, about 50%-60% of the men said that they would want their "wives to be virgins" but at the same time, they also said that they would "want to get some experience" before they do it with their wives so that they are good at performing. HYPOCRISY !!!
We have got to stop being such a hypocritical society. I agree with you 100% when you say that "They are devoid of any principles". Parents should talk to their kids about such issues. Proper awareness and education in these matters is important. Parents should realise that parenting is a huge responsibility and they have a great deal to play in a child's life. It's their way of upbringing that can make one a respectful individual or an eve-teaser. It's a long process but hopefully one day the end result will be good.
well the article was a nice read....everyman ogles but the motive is diff for everyone n tats where the diff lies. i know its very hard for girls to take this..... but i cant see ur idea of girls carrying pistols of any help. i found it qiute impractical. other than tat it was a nice article.
WHY EVERY GUY OUT HERE AFRAID F PISTOLS ANYWAY! I DINT SAY I M GONNA SHOOT U PPL..ONLY T RIBALD OGLERS... WAT IS DIS??
TOO MUCH CONCERNED FOR UR BROTHERHOOD... :p or .......
KUDOS MJ... VERY HONEST... HOPE THEY START MAKING MORE MEN LIKE U... HATS OFF!
Yeah.. thts actly true, tht every man ogles n i think it is only coz of the indian culture tht makes the guys stare at girls like tht n the girls react ths rudely or like many gettn embarresd. if u consider the more developd nations, there isnt any difference between girls and guys. wot a guy can do, a girl can do tht also bt here in india, females are considere inferior to the odr sex.. i knw ths comment would raise more comments abt ths.. bt its actly true, nobody cant deny ths.. n ths diff is the main reason for the feeling the indian women have. there is no sch feasible way to change the scenario, jst the mindset of the ppl of our nation has to change, the girls, the guys, their parents everyone which is actly nt possibl in the near future..
lol...I like it...realli wanted to read something like this ...n I wholly agree with what you've said above :P
it seems u hav actually thought deeply about y men ogle...d topic itself is damn controversial,can provoke ppl to check der moves in public...(n not only men but also women)but such intense thinking is not at all required.our imperturbable reactions to such mindless things is d only solution.
Hi, Keshie
I did not read the full page as it was very big. But with the reading of first paragraph I understand you do not like men staring at you and eve teasing. Because of this reason I never did these type of things with girls. But from the past one year I am changed. I felt if man does not look at girl who will look at her. Eve teasing-no doubt it is wrong. But If a girl is beautiful why a man should not look at her. If she is very beautiful and very stylish Man could not take away his eyes over lady. This is natural human behavior. It is the same case with girls also but the difference is - girls won't stare but they just give a glance. It is because of the restrictions in home. If they are free birds from childhood like men definitely they will do the same. Regarding the foreign men, I feel they would have seen more beauty in and out before they looked at you. I can guess that Eve-teasing in india is high because indian customs does not allow pre-marital sex and this is why most of eve-teasers are bachelors.
Please do not take this message personally. These are my feelings. Please feel free to reply. I will be more interested to know ladies feelings. It will be helpful for me while approaching friends (who are girls).
agreeing with you shamshoddin, But keshei as i perceive, wants to have an environment where looking at girls does'nt carry any ill feelings. boys staring at girls n vice versa is a universal law of nature n beleive me every girl wants the same. Some of my frnds (female) openly tell, if boys don't stare at them, what is the use of this beauty and being stylish n all. Maintaining defensive posture is equally reqd at the same time until our society changes n that we can dream only. But all boys are not that bad. Some glare at you because they appreciate your beauty. It flows into them a kind of refreshment and energy.
@shamshoddin:i gues u will hav to b a girl to realise wat kinda "ogling" keshie means and also wat is it lyk to b on d receiving side of it ........ well for now i can only sugest u to read through the full page if u wanna get atleast some idea of it...
kudos keshie !!! to atleast bring up this topic in public.. :)
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